Saturday 1386 – 4.01.2014
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I am tying this post in ( very loosely) with the Weekly Photo Challenge – Beginning – Why?
Just because I feel like it 🙂
So here we are in another New Year and it seems amazing to me that it is so long since 2000 !
This New Year is a little different for me because it has been some years since I had a man in my life but this year I do and there is potential for 2014 to be a great year for us both. It has certainly begun well ( about 10 weeks now! ) and we have covered a lot of ground in a short space of time.
We share many of the same interests ( the photos show a major one ! ) but what is particularly exciting about this is that we have started from a point of complete honesty, with each other, and this coupled with a willingness to communicate in a very real, accepting, compassionate way is what bodes well for the future.
When you get to my time of life ( nearly 60..gulp! ) and have 2 major relationships behind you, neither of which was noted for its good communication, then you don’t want to enter into a 3rd that follows the same pattern. Andy and I have both made mistakes in previous relationships and we are keen not to repeat these in ours.
This requires reflection on why communication was not good, recognising the patterns that reinforced poor communication and working towards a better way of being with another person in a genuine, open and adult way. It’s not easy and does require work but boy is it worth it !
I am thankful that Andy and I are doing this work together. He is undoubtedly helping me to be the best person I can be and I hope I am doing the same for him.
This all sounds terribly serious doesn’t it? but shouldn’t building a great relationship with someone be a serious business if you want it to succeed? I think it should because if issues that arise (and they always do it’s what happens when 2 ego’s meet ) are not dealt with then they accumulate, fester or build resentment and it’s these things that ultimately cause the collapse of a relationship; as does taking someone for granted.
Don’t get me wrong Andy and I spend a lot of our time laughing and having fun while we get to know each other.. You can be an adult and have a childlike joy too; they are not mutually exclusive.
So I am looking forward to 2014 and continuing to get to know this lovely man in a mindful way, building a true friendship and partnership of equals.
Maybe it soon won’t be “early days” any more. 😉
As ever I welcome your thoughts.
Saturday girl signing off.
You can find my photography blog Photomania here